3 months sum up

Hello bloggers! Its been a while since the last time we meet, ait? Well, kerjaya sebagai seorang guru pelatih di tahun akhir sememangnya benar-benar membuatkan diri ini sibuk 24 jam 7 hari seminggu. Exam is around the corner and 7th Semester will be over just 2 weeks from now. And here it goes 8th Semester, last sem, last year, FAREWELL! Horrayyyy! 

I don't want to mention it, but since idk what to write here, so I will sum up all the things that had happen to me since 3 months ago. and... here it goes!

1. I have completed my 3rd phase practicum at SK. Bukit Quoin, Tawau for 3 months.
2. I have done my Action Research intervention at school and now I don't know how to calculate the data. seriously? Dead meat!
3. I involved in a small car accident which is stupid fate but I'm not gonna regret it.hehe~
4. I thought he was the one, but actually it was a simple mistake. 
5. I have found the love of my life and currently in love.
6. I learn how to be a part-time mechanics. I am a new car expert now. ngee~
7. I bought new Samsung smart phone and I'm thinking to upgrade it to S4. hehew~
8. I turn to the age of 2* on Feb 22nd. It feels like... old? teeettt~~ 
9. I realize that a friend like "you" is a backstabber. 
10. I gain few kilos due to my eating habits and now I'm thinking to start dieting again. ==''

Eemmm.. arrrrr.... errrrr.... hurmm.. ba wanna do some *revision for now. Good luck to all my batch-mates for the coming exams. Till we meet again. xoxo!

BAD KING OF ANGER

Sikit-sikit marah, sikit-sikit marah. 

PEMARAH! tidak faham la sama gaya orang begini. PEMARAH 24 jam. Silap cakap sikit, terus mau marah, buat silap sikit, terus mau marah. Semua ikut suka hati dia. Hye sebelum cakap diri orang, cermin dulu diri tu. Kalau saya yang marah pun saya ada limit juga, bukan juga 24 hours mencari kesalahan orang, terus mau marah dari pagi sampai malam. Tidak penat kah???? dan tidak penat kah mau menyakiti hati org? Sebelum cakap tu, lain kali fikir2 dulu! damn! Amat dialu-alukan untuk buat MUHASABAH diri tu sikit. Please learn new things about "anger management". Harap maklum.

Spontaneous Thursday #5

Ok malam ni banyak perkara sa mau mencarut sini. sblm 2 pesanan penaja, I'll use Sabahan slang ah..

untuk kesekian kali ini, rest in peace to my dear handphone, sorry saya kasi tamat nyawa ko tadi pigi ampas di dinding. memandangkan tida dapat antak kepala di dinding jd handphone juga la jadi mangsa kan. ok, bisuk sa pigi beli smartphone! ko tunggu....

bgn2 ja dari tidur tadi ada suatu perasaan yg sangat pelik mucul. rasa mau burst into tears, rasa gerigitan, rasa mau marah, rasa rimas, gelisah.. eiiii, nda tau la apa ungkapan yg paling sesuai lagi. dan ditambah lagi dengan menerima balasan mesej yang bukan2 memang la bikin panas hati! kalau ada orang di depan sa confirm jadi mangsa cubit. huh!

ok next sa mau bagitau satu dunia yg sa tidak akan balik time cuti Chinese New Year ni. Tahniah vay! mcm pertama kali pula tidak blk cuti sejak2 bermastautin di IP ni. bukan bermaksud sa telampau sayang dgn IP tapi cuti hanya 4 hari??? skolah pun tidak apply cuti peristiwa on Wednesday. pg apply pula cuti yg bukan2. heh! mumy pun cakap nda payah la blk, tiket flight mahal. Mummy suruh pigi sembayang sja di sini. emm yala... ok fine la, lgpun tggl brapa bulan ja lagi stay sini, bagus sa menghayati bumi Tawau ni lama2 kan.. kan? kan? lol. ba sa jadi sekuriti guard Wisma Mawar sepanjang 4 hari ni. ada apa2 kecurian atau masalah terus berhubung saja sama sa. wtf. apala mau bt time cuti ni ah.... mau pigi minta angpow sama tauke cina la.. hekhek. joking! I should go watch some movies dan steamboat maybe untuk kasi gumuk badan.

oya, 1 benda lagi mo kasi tau 1 dunia ni, saya makin kurus!!!

F!~ kurus adalah bida dan skeleton. haha, teringat pula time skolah menengah dulu, classmate slalu  panggil "skeleton2" sbb telampau slim to the max. berat badan 45kg ja time tu. pui bida! nasib la sejak masuk matrikulasi sa pandai membesar sda. lol. dan sekarang sda turun 3 kg pula dlm masa 3 minggu?? kawan2 pun ckp pipi makin cengkung, badan makin slim, dan seluar pun makin longgar.. mungkin sa perlu borong seluar pelbagai saiz supaya ada masa2 buli pakai time kurus ataupun gemuk. le sighing....
oleh itu di kesempatan ini, sa mau ucap terima kasih sama praktikum dan skolah sk. BQ sbb kasi kurus sa..TQ!

dan... ada satu situasi pelik skrg.. sekali lagi mengalami situasi yang berbeza dan tidak jauh bezanya seperti tahun2 sblm ini.. dan sa yakin situasi ini akan berpanjangan smpai la akhir tahun saya di sini. arggghh, damn! 1 pokok banyak dahan. 1 dahan patah, tumbuh lagi dahan baru. dahan lama buruk, reput tapi tidak mau dibakar. sayang tiada pemetik api. peribahasa yang sa cipta sendiri. hahahaha! terpulang la mau tgk diri ni mcm mana. yg ptg x hipokrit. and I know myself. I drink, but I don't do drugs ok. kadang2 sa sensitif sbb sa ni manusia, ada perasaan. everyone has their own imperfection ba kn..so it depends la kalau mau judging someone. tp jan lupa, anda tidak layak menghakimi melainkan Dia.. bla.. bla.. bla.. mode mencarut..

ok sekian terima kasih! :)

Falling slowly ~ my FAREWELL year

Currently listening to this song, Falling slowly by Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova. I've listen it once before but I totally forget where the sounds came from. 

so fortunately today! I found this song while re-watching Family Outing Season 1 during Lee Chun Hee and Park Hae Jin Farewell episode. and yaa... here it goes again..  it tears me up, thinking that this year will be my FAREWELL YEAR after nearly 4 years stranded in this "not-so-lovely-place" of mine. Although I need to make it through for another 1 year (few months left actually..) but I strongly felt that it's going to end  up soon.
 I mean really soon.
 Now is the end of January
February
March
April
May
June
July
August
September
October
November (the end)
Yea, of course this long teaching-learning journey will come to an end. But why is this feeling come to appear so early???

sobsob =.=' me was just so sensitive..

so here it is.. I love the lyrics..till then, enjoy :)

Nothing is eternal

God wants you to know that... everything passes.

Nothing is eternal, even the sun will one day disappear. Remember this simple truth whenever you are suffering, that the suffering too shall pass, and it will become easier to bear. 

I believe... with God all things are possible. Amen :)

Everyday is a second chance

happy morning! hey its weekend people! teehee ~ ~ ~

I woke up early this morning, as early as 5 am. Thanks to my biological clock.. yeah!

Btw, I kinda regret for sleep too early last night, maybe I should say sorry to him. I promise to have a call on the phone but... at the end of the day, I lost on the bed dreaming... zzzzzzzz

Today I will full-fill my day with school stuffs.. yeah you know, writing lesson plan for next week class, updating my portfolio, printing, etc... bla bla bla.. =='

being at SK. Bukit Quoin for my third phase of practicum was awesome* mabye..
For the first week it was just Okay*, still trying to adapt myself with the school environment, the teachers are friendly, the foods, hurmmmm *sigh* compared to SK. Kem Kabota, I only gave them 5 out of 10!
 oh the kids at school are cute and innocent too. miahaha.. 

"Cikgu, cantik la cikgu, comel la.. cikgu Elizabeth.."
Cikgu Elizabeth? hahaha, class please call me teacher Elvy okay,

I thought I had the simplest name on earth ==' 

anyway, cant wait to teach them though.. ^___^

and that's it, HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND everyone!

enjoy it while you still can, remember everyday is a second chance :D

It will never be the same

hye kawan...

TRUST doesn't come with a refill.

Once it's gone, you probably won't get it back and if you do,

it will never be the same.

That's a fact!

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY #16

Mico, I'll miss u so bad! :(

They means a lot to me, BONZER :)

mumuk and me :)

Meg and me again :)

At Kinabalu National Park :)

Waiting for the wedding mass at Bundu Tuhan, Ranau. sempat lg. hehe :)

Noty me, kiko and diding! :)

Memories remains forever :)

My two bonzer, I love you! Hugs Hugs Hugs~ C yaa again on March.

Don't forget ah tu promises you've made. BMI~BMI~BMI. xoxo!

=^^="

Dearest FAMILY, I love you!

Turning 2* next month but right now I cry like tomorrow is the end of the world..  *crying baby la sampai tua ni! New year is about start but when I think about leaving my family and rest of the members including my pets really make me down to earth. Why is this feeling strikes too much ah? Seeing mummy and daddy falling asleep at the living rooms just now is like I won’t going to see them for another hundreds years. Damn. I will see them in three months from now ba. but why? why I can’t endure this too much sad feeling ah? Yes, I couldn't agree more. Family is the most important thing in my entire life right now. I can’t wait for this year to end so that I can spend the rest of my life with them before posting next year. Mum and Dad wait for me OK! I promise I will give both of you a better life! I promise!  And to my dearest sister, I hope you will find a job that will suit you. I wish you to have a better life cause you are getting older..hihi~ One more thing, please treat mummy well ah, she complains something about you lately but I remain in silent, just don’t want to drown us in tears..

Precious gift from God :)

Send my regards to the rest of our family members, I love them so much. Please tell them to pray for me, especially for my final battle year. I am so nervous to death right now ni. Don’t know if I can make it to the end or not. Last but not least.. feeds Mico, Possum and Chipii lots of good foods kio, let them getting fat not you. hehe…

Pray for me, pray for my journey..
Let us keep our faith burning in this Year of Faith. Amen.

I love all of you..

Lots of love, ev <3

BE AWARE OF 2013

Salam damai.. Pernahkah kamu mengalami situasi begini?

Ketika seseorang insan yang hanya akan mencari kita apabila mereka memerlukan kita sahaja. Saya yakin anda pernah mengalaminya. Insan-insan ini akan mencari kita apabila mereka berada dalam kesusahan, berada dalam keseorangan, berada dalam kesulitan, berada dalam kegawatan ekonomi dan sebagainya. Dan ketika itulah insan-insan ini akan berusaha mendapatkan pertolongan dari kita. Bukan maksudnya disini kita tamak atau tidak mahu menolong tetapi jikalau sudah "KACANG LUPAKAN KULIT" adakah kita perlu meneruskan pertolongan tersebut? Bertambah sedih lagi apabila insan-insan ini sudah mengecapi kesenangan lalu terus diam tanpa sepatah ucapan TERIMA KASIH dan hilang tanpa khabar berita. Dimanakah nilainya sebuah PENGHARGAAN? Bukan bermaksud kita ini gilakan pembalasan terhadap pertolongan yang diberi tetapi setidak-tidaknya mereka menghargai nilai usaha yang telah kita lakukan untuk menolong mereka ketika insan-insan ini benar-benar memerlukan kita. Sehinggalah pada suatu hari kesusahan menimpa mereka semula, dan disitulah mereka akan mencari kita semula untuk meminta ehsan pertolongan buat kali kedua, ketiga, keempat, dan lagi?? Saya begitu hairan mengapa sungguh mudah kita dilupakan apabila insan-insan ini sudah mendapat apa yang mereka perlukan tetapi mencari kita semula apabila diperlukan. Dunia oh dunia? Adakah kita ini Teko Ajaib ataupun Poket Doraemon yang penuh dengan rekaan semata-mata?? 

Mungkin tidak perlu lagi terlalu baik hati melayani insan-insan sebegini. Kurangkan penindasanmu wahai kawan. Jangan suka MEMPERGUNAKAN orang lain untuk manfaat diri sendiri. Jangan lupa, ramai yang tahu.

Pesanan penaja ini adalah peringatan kepada diri sendiri yang sememangnya lemah tertindas dan kepada insan-insan yang tidak sedar-sedarkan diri. Semoga insan-insan ini sedar dengan perbuatan penindasan mereka. Marilah kita memperbaiki diri kita sendiri di tahun yang baru ini.

BIAR PEDAS

HINGGA LEMAS

JANGAN TERTINDAS

DIRI SENDIRI TEWAS.

Sekian, Selamat Tahun Baru 2013!  

You're a little late, I'm already TORN

I thought I saw a man brought to life,

He was warm, he came around like he was dignified,

He showed me what it was to cry,

Well you couldn't be that man I adored.

You don't seem to know, seem to care, what your heart is for,

But I don't know him anymore,

There's nothing where he used to lie,

My conversation has run dry,

That's what's goin' on. Nothing's fine I'm torn...

I'm all out of faith,

This is how I feel,

I'm cold and I am shamed,

Lying naked on the floor,

Illusion never changed,

Into something real,

I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn,

You're a little late, I'm already torn,

So I guess the fortune teller's right,

I should have seen just what was there and not some holy light,

But you crawelled beneath my veins and now,

I don't care, I have no luck, I don't miss it all that much,

There's just so many things,

That I can't touch I'm torn.

I'm all out of faith,

This is how I feel,

I'm cold and I am shamed,

Lying naked on the floor,

Illusion never changed,

Into something real,

I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn,

You're a little late, I'm already torn,

Torn,

There's nothing where he used to lie,

My insparation has run dry,

That's what's goin' on ... nothing's right I'm torn

I'm all out of faith,

This is how I feel,

I'm cold and I'm ashamed,

Lying naked on the floor,

Illusion never changed,

Into something real,

I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn

I'm all out of faith,

This is how I feel,

I'm cold and I'm ashamed,

Bound and broken on the floor,

You're a little late, I'm already torn,

Torn.

Sometimes it's best to walk away from someone you're not a good match with, even though you love them. It hurts like mad to do it. But in the long run it was better. The fact that you're considering this option shows you're smart and mature. is it huh? You realize that love is only one factor in a healthy relationship. ~Justsaying~

Teeeheeee~~

Thank God, its already Friday! yihaaa! 

Thank God I'm still alive in this cruel world of mine!

Omoooo.. sekarang saya sangat lapar. SASAU berada di dalam fikiran sejak pagi tadi..

 Oh... aku ingin makan benda itu.. hurmmm~

Going to Sam's house at 2pm this evening, I wish to eat lotsa foods there *even though tiada SASAU!* 

tp yang penting saya dapat makan sadap!

#Sabahansays tapunnnnnnn tapunnnnnnn dulu kio..

Bumi balung dilanda hujan ketika ini, kenapalah tiada ribut?? Buli saya ber'hibernate =.=' LoL

Ketika ini juga sedang khatam subjek ELE3104 English Language Teaching yang agak killer so-so. 

The truth is *saya pun tidak faham apa yang saya baca ini* 

nvm, ELVY VALERIE fighting!!!

Btw, otak saya sebenarnya bergeliga untuk merancang aktiviti2 semasa cuti dua bulan nanti.
First thing first, I regret that I didn't come for the BR1M interview last Wednesday at LHD.. kalau tidak, RM59 salary per day waiting for me in hand! hurmmm. tepala.. Tuhan bilang bukan rezeki saya.. ceh mcm confirm dapat kan.. haha :D

Second thing, saya perlu kumpul semua Movies, Korean Dramas and TV Series yang best dari kengkawan sebagai bekalan yang hendak ditonton sepanjang musim cuti.. but problem is, both of my external already limited space sudah. gara-gara RUNNING MAN yang memakan beberapa puluhratus G. Maybe I should buy my 3rd external next year =.=''

Next, I want to cooking like a pro at home. Well my interest in cooking and experimenting foods growing incredibly since I stay outside for 2 months during my practicum. Banyak resepi baru mahu dimasak ni, especially Western foods.. 

Mum and dad, you should be proud of me.

Saya pandai masak sudah! cehhhh~ hehehe :D :D :D

Paling penting time cuti nanti saya mau reunion and hangout with my old school bestfriends!

saya rindu gila~gila sudah sama dorang. 

Sabar kamu ahhh, tidak lama lagi saya akan balik dengan tenang!

oya.. Me, O'mel and Coner (my bestfriends at KML, Labuan) plan untuk jumpa di KK during holiday!

ni kali lahhh.. after 4 years tidak jumpa... 

I am super speechless and damn excited!

SUNGAI BABAGON! ini lagi salah satu destinasi yang akan dituju nanti time cuti2 malaysia bersama Rosalia and the geng. Baaa, ada lagi yang mau join? plan untuk ater rafting di Sungai Kiulu macam tidak jadi pula atas sebab-sebab keselamatan. *saya dgr2 ada buaya* yaiiii scary..

 nasib saya come back in one piece hari tu. miahaha~~

On December once again akan menjejakkan kaki ke bumi Kuching Sarawak for my sister convocation day. 

Congrats ELSIE VIVIAN! 

*bila awak nak kerja ni? teringin pula nak makan SASAU kat kedai Ching Fah!*

Ok, setakat itu saja laporan cuti-cuti Malaysia. 

Thank God its Friday again and thank You for the other days also..

~teheeeee~

Have a great weekends creatures!

Wordless Wednesday #15

WORDS I WANT TO SAY TO YOU :)

한국 인사!

Singgah-singgah sini dengar lagu baru dari RUNNING MAN members, Sparta Kookie featuring Haroro and Gelly *oh yeah! my favourite Running Man team* <3

Kim Jong Kook and the two kids

Best! best! sangat best! Pop featuring reggae and rap! 

ENJOY bloggers~~ ngeeee...
(jan lupa click pause button sana bawah dulu ahhhh)

Nah... yang nda faham Korea2 tu, ini English translation dia ok..hehe ^^

WORDS I WANT TO SAY TO YOU by KJK and d two kids :D

[Jong Kook]
There are still a lot of words left that I want to tell you
But I can’t seem to say anything at all

[HaHa]
Without you I can’t live even one day
Even if I die I can’t send you away
I pledge this thousands of times
In frnt of those tears that fell with no sound
In front of your tired shoulders
Suddenly no words came out of me

[Gary]
Our love has become tedious now
We’re standing and praying at the intersection of separation
Wanting to walk out quickly from this staggering maze
We’ve been on this time of weariness for too long
that now we’re at an ending point
I want to see your laughing face
More than anything that will be the biggest gift for me
I want to hold tight your small hands
Walking together as the sun sets

[Jong Kook]
There are still a lot of words left that I want to tell you
But I can’t seem to say anything at all
Now the only word that remains is the words “I Love You”
I can’t even cry and instead just stand in front of you

[HaHa]
I’m sorry that I’m saying “sorry” instead of “I love you”
I’m getting mad rather than grabbing on and holding on to you
When you turn your back coldly now I can send you off

[Gary]
Sometimes I also get mad
Until now I look blankly at the times we were in love
One by one starting to know one another shyly those happy times
Now can we really not turn back?
Do we really want something different, you and I?
Could it be there’s no way to come back?
Right now pleae trust your heart to me

[Jong Kook]
There are still a lot of words left that I want to tell you
But I can’t seem to say anything at all
Now the only word that remains is the words “I Love You”
I can’t even cry and instead just stand in front of you

I still see you in front of me
You still dazzle me oh

[Jong Kook, Gary, Haha]
There are still a lot of words left that I want to tell you
But I can’t seem to say anything at all
Now the only word that remains is the words “I Love You”
I can’t even cry and instead just stand in front of you

I can’t even cry and instead just stand in front of you

P/S: pssssst~ RUNNING MAN is my addiction.. thank you for making my life so wonderful <3

Do not take someone for granted

Midnight already. feels like wanna write down something unsure in here. But dunno what. ah, hantam saja la. Being more emotional and sensitive lately. iskk! CAUTION : Too much thinking will lead to depression. DANGER!

The atmosphere at home sweet home makes me wanna stay longer here but sadly need to go back to that place on Thursday, sitting for final exams next week (luckily only got 3 papers for this semester. only?? ~.~) and then I'll be back home again soon for my long term holiday... yaa, two weeks later. yihaaa!!!

Rasa macam cuti ini sudah bermula. mimpi! tapi berada di rumah sekarang memang mimpi! ter'balik rumah secara tidak sengaja 'coz one of my 'favourite' Uncle passed away 3 days ago.huhuhu... REST IN PEACE my dear uncle. I believe you are on HIS side right now.  
Ya Bapa, terimalah dengan sukacita ahli keluarga kami yang telah Engkau panggil dan bawalah mereka ke dalam rumahMu. Amen. Yang pergi tidak akan kembali...

Mungkin ini saja coretan?

P/s: Do not take someone or something for granted. Its not yours..

Goodnight earth and creatures :)

sweet dreams dear moon..

Thousand times maybe

I tend to believe the best of people and that's why I've been hurt so many times, damn easy to get hurt.

 yaa, that's me. =.=" screw me.

Recently, after SYD 3, I've make the best decision that I thing that would be the best for me. But at the end of the day, I let it happened again. My mistake. How many mistake should I do for the same reason huh???

 Is this what's we called God's will? Is this what He really want me to do? I had no idea. Right now I'm still struggling with myself, forgiveness, happiness and healing memories. I pray not to look back again. 

NOT TO LOOK BACK AGAIN! 

But still, I am stuck in my own world and just don't have a place to go..

Dear God :(

 "If you don't know what you're doing, pray to the Father. He loves to help. 

You'll get his help, and won't be condescended to when you ask for it.

Ask boldly, believing without a second thought."

James 1:5

Wordless Wednesday #14

teeeheee~

Honestly..

We used to be so close...

and now we looked each other like we barely know each other.

I used to come to you with all my secrets..

but a lot has changed this year,

I do not know what's wrong.

Maybe it comes from me.

and it tears me up that somewhere along the way I lost you as a 'bestfriend'. 
"bestfriend ?"

I don't think that things can ever go back to the way we were before,

and I can honestly say that I miss you..  </3
I am sorry..

Looooooooong time No C!

dear BLOGGER!

hai!!

bonjour!!

hola!

salve!

lama suda berkubu ni blog, jadi zombie sda, mcm the WALKING DEAD! hahaha. ampun beribu ribu ampun. well, the truth is, I've been so busy with my first practicum since March, continue with a bundles of assignments and going through to my semester 5 final exams. and then my 3 weeks HOLIDAY.

*to sum up.. cakap saja sebenarnya sa malas mengupdate blog, lost some passion into blogging =.=' *

btw, semester ni adalah semester 6 tahun ke-3. tahun depan FINAL YEAR!! kemonnnnnn... x sabar maw kahwin.. tetttt.. apa kes.. hohoho :P eh, sememangnya banyak kes yang berlaku semenjak beberapa bulan ni tanpa disedari. ada yang baik dan ada yang paling burukkkkkkkkkkkk. ok forget it.

baru saja habis menjalani praktikum Fasa 2 selama 2 bulan di SK.KEM KABOTA, TAWAU. satu-satunya sekolah yang terletak di dalam kem askar di tawau ni. hoho.. le me impression about this school?

HEAVEN OF FOODS!! hahaha

Back to real life. tggl 3 minggu lagi saya akan kembali ke kampung halaman untuk bercuti hujung tahun. 

oWh yeahhh!

exam is just around the corner but now saya masih dalam mood "berlugai-lugai" kata orang sabah style.

tunggu dewa "porm" datang then saya akan mula study. lagipun semester ni cuma ada 3 paper ja.

soooo.. kekekeke.. enjoy2 dulu, yang penting jangan turun pointer.

baaa,, sekian laporan.. kita jumpa lagi. saya harap saya akan rajin mengupdate selepas ini sebab terlalu banyak cerita yang tidak dapat diungkapkan hanya dengan hati dan perasaan.. cehhh..

adios!!

au revoir!!

cheerio!!